The things that I think of...

Audra and I went to Acadia National Park in Maine for Memorial Day Weekend. We found this cool set of rocks along the coast and came across a large overhang that looked like a cave. I asked her to come down in the cave with me, but she wouldn't.

For the rest of the hike I was thinking of this stupid scenario...

"Audra, come check this out"

"What's down there"

"Nothing. Just some bats"

"What? Did you say hats"?

"Yes. That's what I said. This cave is full of hats. No. I said bats"

"I'm not coming down into a cave full of bats"

"Are you afraid of bats?"

"No. Not the actual bats. I'm afraid of the vampires that they eventually turn into"

"That IS a valid fear, since it's well known that all bats, regardless of their species immediately turn into vampires the minute that the sun goes down."

"So you agree with me?"

"I do. And I also can help you. I didn't want to tell you, but I'm actually a werewolf"

"I kinda figured that, but what's that got to do with me?"

" Everyone knows that the werewolf is the natural enemy of the vampire and one of few creatures that can kill it"

" Go on"

"So if these bats turn into vampires, I'll change into a werewolf and protect you"

"You'll be one werewolf against thousands of bats"

" So"

"One against a thousand isn't good odds"

"I know karate"

"Besides, what's to stop you from attacking me along with the vampires. You might even join their team."

"' I guess you'll have to trust me. I assume I'll be able to control myself"

" You, I trust. Werewolf Mike...I don't know. Seems risky"

" You don't have many options"

" I have one option. I won't go down in the cave"

" Whatever you want"

" Good"

"You're probably making the right decision. I'm not sure I'm a werewolf anyway. I just got bitten by a dog once that looked like a wolf, so I assumed that I had a werewolf gene buried in me somewhere. Plus, I don't think these are bats either. Now that I look closely, they're just little rocks"