I'm glad I'm not fat. And not because of the sweating and health problems, but because I wouldn't be able to type anymore.
The average keyboard is pretty biased towards the average person with an even-keeled weight. If I were over, say 300 lbs., I'm pretty sure my sausage-like fingers would be too large to hit the keys with any accuracy.
Any sporadic, ill-received funny thoughts would come out like adkfjad! Aglj;lakg, Jlkag;l kjh jh,;ka.jdflkjas!!!!! Who would laugh at that, even if it were remotely funny? Which it was, believe me.
I suppose I could use a pencil in each hand to peck at the keys, but the speed I've developed over the years would be reduced exponentially. Plus, it would undo everything I learned in typing class in High School and I don't want to disappoint Miss What'shername. She'd roll over in her grave, if she's even dead yet.
And you cant do the home row thing with two pencils. I suppose I could attach a pencil to every finger, ala Freddy Krueger, but it seems like way too much work, especially since I'm fat at this point. And what if I had to go answer the door.
What would you do if some guy answered the door with pencils taped to his finger? Run! That's what you'd do. Unless you needed something signed, in which case it would be pretty damned convenient, wouldn't it?
It probably wouldn't even come to that, because I'm pretty sure I would be very unable to open any door with hands like that. Unless it was a revolving door, but that's just crazy talk.
No, Its easier to lay off the donuts and Suzy Q's once in awhile.